Hi Friends,



“Jesus Saves”



Jesus and Satan have a discussion as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest, with God as the judge.

They sit themselves at their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight. Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over.



He asks Satan to show what he has come up with. Satan is visibly upset, and cries, “I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out.”



“Very well, then,” says God, “let us see if Jesus fared any better.”



Jesus enters a command, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers. Satan is astonished.



He stutters, “B-b-but how? I lost everything, yet Jesus’ program is intact. How did he do it?”



God smiled all-knowingly, “Jesus saves.”





Lawyers and Engineers





Three lawyers and three engineers are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, each of the three lawyers buys a ticket while the three engineers buy only one ticket.

“How can the three of you travel on one ticket?” asks a lawyer.



“Watch and you’ll see,” answers an engineer.



Aboard the train the lawyers take their respective seats while all three engineers cram into the restroom and squeeze the door closed behind them.



When the conductor comes around collecting tickets, he knocks on the restroom door and says, “Ticket, please.” The door opens a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.



The lawyers are impressed with this clever idea. One the way home from the conference, they decide to copy the engineers’ technique. At the station, they buy a single ticket for their return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don’t buy a ticket at all!



“How in the hell are you going to pull this off?” asks a lawyer.



“Watch and you’ll see,” answers an engineer.



They board the train. The three lawyers cram into one restroom and the three engineers cram into the other restroom.



Shortly after the train departs, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and knocks on the other restroom door. “Ticket, please!”





Warm Regards,

Swaminathan.