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To be tongue-tied is to be invisible
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To be tongue-tied is to be invisible
The fear of speaking is by far the number one fear of humans. And this is not just limited to public speaking on a podium or giving a presentation. The fear even manifests itself in day-to-day interactions where you find yourself clamming up when there is so much you could have said and even wanted to say!
This communication challenge often leaves shy people tongue-tied and melting into the background, as they prefer to silently listen to people around them rather than speaking up.
Well, such people might as well be invisible!
It could be overpowering anxiety or nervousness which makes it difficult for them to take part in a conversation, express ideas, answer questions about their work, justify their actions, ask for something, participate in a meeting/discussion, network with people and even interview for a job. In fact, some diffident employees have been known to pass up a promotion just because they would have had to interact with subordinates, conduct meetings and discipline staff.
Well, while you may be content with your tendency towards silence, remember that it can seriously inhibit your professional growth. It can also paint you as passive, aloof or even arrogant depending on a person’s interpretation. Moreover, with rampant recession, you may even find yourself at the top of the layoff list despite your loyalty/seniority as communication skills do form an important yardstick for your capabilities.
You have no choice but to become expressive and articulate. Self-expression is extremely important for you to be able to assert your abilities, make your efforts visible as well as gain respect and goodwill. It will help you to stand up for yourself, build a rapport and meet new people. In fact, “Having good conversation skills is like shining a flashlight on what is otherwise considered as a typical work routine day!”
Do it: Some people are naturally eloquent and can charm their way with anyone while most others have to work at it. You don’t have to become an exceptional orator, just learn to communicate effectively and be able to carry a conversation with different people from colleagues and bosses to clients and new people. Here are a few tips for the same:
• Face your fears; do not try to hide from them. Accept that you are afraid/anxious of speaking and then try to do something about it
• Make note of your communication patterns – like, do you feel more comfortable in a one-to-one situation. If you feel intimidated of talking in a group setting, try to create occasions to deal with people individually
• Preparing yourself in advance also helps to curb the panic and minimises the stress. Strategise an action plan of how you will deal with the situation, be it presenting a proposal, asking for assistance or defending yourself
• Visualise yourself as being successful. This may seem childish; but can actually reduce the nervousness
• Be prepared to wait, as timing what you say is important. Never butt into a conversation
• When the time comes, take a deep breath and force yourself to speak what you want to say
• When speaking, be honest, respectful, and firm and maintain eye contact. Project that you are speaking with confidence, even if you may actually be quivering inside
• Take the pressure off yourself; stop worrying about what people will think of you, as you are not here to impress others. Be relaxed, comfortable and just focus on what you want to say
• Make it a habit to make the first move by saying hello and smiling when you meet people. Take advantage of any opportunity to strike up a conversation with people
• Be interested in what people are saying and willing to share things about you. But do avoid phrases that make you seem arrogant or presumptuous
• You can even choose to read self-help books or take a short learning course
After all, good communication is an art that is acquired, developed and improved by experience! All you need is practice and determination.
Source:
http://-
This communication challenge often leaves shy people tongue-tied and melting into the background, as they prefer to silently listen to people around them rather than speaking up.
Well, such people might as well be invisible!
It could be overpowering anxiety or nervousness which makes it difficult for them to take part in a conversation, express ideas, answer questions about their work, justify their actions, ask for something, participate in a meeting/discussion, network with people and even interview for a job. In fact, some diffident employees have been known to pass up a promotion just because they would have had to interact with subordinates, conduct meetings and discipline staff.
Well, while you may be content with your tendency towards silence, remember that it can seriously inhibit your professional growth. It can also paint you as passive, aloof or even arrogant depending on a person’s interpretation. Moreover, with rampant recession, you may even find yourself at the top of the layoff list despite your loyalty/seniority as communication skills do form an important yardstick for your capabilities.
You have no choice but to become expressive and articulate. Self-expression is extremely important for you to be able to assert your abilities, make your efforts visible as well as gain respect and goodwill. It will help you to stand up for yourself, build a rapport and meet new people. In fact, “Having good conversation skills is like shining a flashlight on what is otherwise considered as a typical work routine day!”
Do it: Some people are naturally eloquent and can charm their way with anyone while most others have to work at it. You don’t have to become an exceptional orator, just learn to communicate effectively and be able to carry a conversation with different people from colleagues and bosses to clients and new people. Here are a few tips for the same:
• Face your fears; do not try to hide from them. Accept that you are afraid/anxious of speaking and then try to do something about it
• Make note of your communication patterns – like, do you feel more comfortable in a one-to-one situation. If you feel intimidated of talking in a group setting, try to create occasions to deal with people individually
• Preparing yourself in advance also helps to curb the panic and minimises the stress. Strategise an action plan of how you will deal with the situation, be it presenting a proposal, asking for assistance or defending yourself
• Visualise yourself as being successful. This may seem childish; but can actually reduce the nervousness
• Be prepared to wait, as timing what you say is important. Never butt into a conversation
• When the time comes, take a deep breath and force yourself to speak what you want to say
• When speaking, be honest, respectful, and firm and maintain eye contact. Project that you are speaking with confidence, even if you may actually be quivering inside
• Take the pressure off yourself; stop worrying about what people will think of you, as you are not here to impress others. Be relaxed, comfortable and just focus on what you want to say
• Make it a habit to make the first move by saying hello and smiling when you meet people. Take advantage of any opportunity to strike up a conversation with people
• Be interested in what people are saying and willing to share things about you. But do avoid phrases that make you seem arrogant or presumptuous
• You can even choose to read self-help books or take a short learning course
After all, good communication is an art that is acquired, developed and improved by experience! All you need is practice and determination.
Source:
http://-
