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Internal dialogue is the NLP term for the voice(s) people speak to themselves with. Internal dialogue is often out of consciousness, but as you start to become more aware of it, it becomes much easier to hear it consciously. In some eastern traditions, internal dialogue is referred to as ‘the chattering monkey’, and years of practice are spent in meditation with the aim of getting the monkey to stop chattering (among other things.) The reason for this is that they believe that internal dialogue can be a barrier to clear perception and enlightenment.
From an NLP perspective, internal dialogue is often the channel people use to ‘beat themselves up’, reinforce limiting beliefs and generally stop themselves having more fun in their lives, so it’s nice to know that you can get more control over it & make it quiet. The really good news is I’m going to show you how you can do this fast.
By the way, you may have noticed that you went quiet on the inside while practicing last week’s exercises on peripheral vision. If that way works for you, great! You’ve managed to eliminate two of the obstacles at one go.
Mind & body are one system
The first technique to switch off internal dialogue is one I learned few years ago. I’ve used it consistently ever since.
1) Stick out your tongue & grasp it gently but firmly between your thumb & forefinger. Wait a few moments as you continue to breathe. You may well become quiet inside.
This works on the basis that mind & body are one system. Internal dialogue is accompanied by tiny micro-muscle movements of the tongue & larynx. When these movements are restricted by your thumb & forefinger, the internal voice stops. Now, I know what you’re thinking – it’s not very practical to go around with your tongue clasped between your fingers, so part two is as follows:
2) If exercise 1 works well for you, gently place the tip of your tongue against the roof of your mouth just behind your front teeth (continue to breathe easily.) You will stay quiet.
I use this approach when I’m doing one to one work with people. It allows me to quieten down on the inside so that I can put all my attention on them & what they’re saying & doing. It also allows me to really watch & listen, because I’m not inside my head having conversations with myself about what I think is going on…except when I do. When I catch myself talking to myself when I should be in ‘watch & listen’ mode, I merely do the following:
3) With a soft, gentle & patient tone, go inside & say to yourself "Shhhhhhh, shhhhhhh", like you would if you were soothing a little baby. Allow yourself to smile on the inside & really feel a sense of patience with the monkey. It may take up to a minute before you go quiet inside.
The next approach is one of the first NLP interventions I ever learned, and is incredibly simple.
4) Go inside your mind & find the volume control for internal dialogue (usually either a dial or a slider.) If you can’t find one, just imagine one – it will work just as well for our purposes. Now turn the volume control up & hear the dialogue get louder. Turn it down & hear it get quieter. Then turn it all the way off. Quiet.
The final approach is one I learned from Richard Bandler. I only tend to use it when I’m trying to pay attention on the outside but some nagging thought keeps drawing my attention inside.
5) In a firm but loving tone of voice, say "Shut the *!&% up!" inside your head. Repeat as necessary.
No one approach works for everybody, but each of these approaches will work for some people. Practice when you are relatively relaxed and have some time, and you will find the ones that work best for you. As you begin to get into the habit of using them systematically & consistently, you will really start to reap the benefits.

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