Wife : Shall I prepare Curry or Soup today?



Husband : First make it, we'll name it later.



A frustrated husband in front of his laptop :

Dear google, please do not behave like my wife...

Please allow me to complete my sentence before you start guessing & suggesting.



A married man's prayer :



Dear God, You gave me childhood, You took it away

You gave me youth, You took it away.

You gave me a wife ... It's been years now, so just reminding You.



A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work. His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.

"My hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I'm still in my pyjamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight !



What the hell did you bring him home for?"

Husband answers "Because he's thinking of getting married"



Employee : Sir You are like a lion in the office! What about at home ???

Boss : I am a lion at home too, But there we have a lion tamer !!!



A couple was having dinner at a fancy restaurant. As the food was served, the husband said, "the food looks delicious, let's eat."



Wife : honey ... you say a prayer before eating at home.

Husband : that's at home sweetheart ... here the chef knows how to cook.





Best Slogan on a MAN's T-Shirt :



"Please Do Not Disturb me, I am Married and already very Disturbed"