You're so right, Sri. Recently, a very good friend of mine told me to live in the present, as he always does, not get caught by the past, not think too much about the future since it doesn't depend entirely on me and sometimes seems so uncertain.
I know I'm trying, not wanting to let the moments go by. Stories like this one help a lot in understanding that after all it's about perspectives, about the way you choose to see certain aspects of your life, deal with some memories or feelings and move on.

I will simply say: "Just what I need" but not with the tone of the person from your story.
We're so often caught by our depressions, our self-pity, our feelings of failures or loneliness that we miss the real beauty of life and also the real important issues. We tend to dramatize and get used to feeling low, "enjoying" our negativity, nourishing our depression with pessimism, with our dissatisfactions...

Why can't we see that there are people who have real problems, that there are others less fortunate than us who feel blessed and happy with small gestures and common things we take for granted? Why only in these moments we find the way back to our inner self and find comfort? Why only when we see life can be even more harsh, or when we realize we forgot how to be happy with small things, that we start seeing the other side of the coin and look at our life from a different perspective? Aren't we selfish and shallow?

You're right: I do. A lot...
I was first thrilled I will have an interesting reading for the weekend, but browsing through it I discovered it will be much more than this.
Thank you.

Trust me Neil, I saw the answer in you and luckily there are people like you to teach about the right values.
Luckily there are great leaders who aren't good only in theory but "practice what they preach".
There are - even better - leaders who don't preach but people follow them because they have the vision, the empathy, the power to motivate others and the modesty to never speak about themselves. For these people humility, honesty aren't weaknesses, but strengths that show a great character. I only wish there were more...

You're welcome Shweta :)
Keep in touch and good luck.

You go to HR Forums, "Start a new topic" and then select forum and search under HR Zone the section called Job Descriptions.
Your information will be posted in HR Job Descriptions.

Neil,
I gave you the reasons for asking myself those questions. I have my own convictions, I have my own principles and I follow them while learning and getting more experience in life and in my work. How about the young generation, who seek guidance and often follow the wrong models, the so called leaders who need to be praised and to show off so they can impress their inexperienced employees, their colleagues? How about the models shown by media, the politicians with empty speeches and stereotypical language who can talk for hours and say nothing, but yet gain so many followers?
It may not be the case in your country but unfortunately it is often seen in mine and that makes anyone wonder how the young generation will be able to learn the right lessons, to make a clear distinction between real leaders and fake ones, how will they be able to set their own life values and how they’ll want to grow as personalities.

I asked myself this question many times. Can an intelligent, skilled person but introverted or modest one be a good leader? Can he get noticed in a world where so many claim to be the best, to know everything and live to show off and impress others? We all know that is easy to manipulate people, that many are so shallow and follow the wrong models only because they lack the knowledge, the depth in thinking or the experience to objectively choose. We know that the media isn’t helping much in setting the right criteria and pointing out towards the real models of a society because it’s much easier to gain audience by showing controversial situations or characters. Demagogy became a science mastered by many and dishonesty became a second nature.

Can humility be a useful personality trait in a world where people are often judged by appearances and the majority takes credit for others’ ideas and work? Can you stay in a shadow, be good in what you do and be appreciated without having to underline your merits? Can you let your accomplishments speak for you?

I still believe modesty is essential in a team work. I still believe in giving credit for each of the team members for their share, their implication, contribution to the common success. I strongly believe you can’t do anything by your own, especially today when we’re focusing on high specializations, in becoming good in real narrow sectors and not on having a vague idea about everything.
I still believe words are overused and your actions and results should speak for you.
I still believe humility is a virtue and even if there will be less people who’ll notice you, those who will, will definitely be the right ones, the ones who’s opinion matter to you.

What do you think? What is the perfect recipe? Is there such thing? How much do you have to be aware you’re good and tell others that and how much you have to be modest and let others and your work define you?

Hi Shweta,
You can post any job opening on HR Jobs section, mentionning all the details and the city.

I understand your point of view Nimali…and the situation you described is present in various fields.
You mentioned private owned companies…
How many of us have their own companies, businesses or are shareholders at the company they’re working for? Very few…Why?
Some lack the meanings for this, some lack the entrepreneurial spirit, including courage, perseverance, an analytical mind or managerial skills. Possessing the same goal or knowledge isn’t enough to make you start your own business. Many of us will end up working for someone else’s company, being part of a hierarchic system, ran by a manager.
Real entrepreneurs have vision, creativity, are inborn-leaders, who had the strong motivation, the courage and the intelligence to start their firm and surround themselves with skilled employees in key positions. We can have the same goal, possess the necessary knowledge but yet not the skills to be a good entrepreneur or manager or to even want this.
The best manager is not a person who knows and can do everything for his company but that person smart enough to understand the entire necessary scenario for the success of his company, who delegates responsibilities, appointing the best people, giving them the freedom and trust to run a certain department.
Such a company gives you the perfect “environment” to use your skills for its benefit, to grow professionally, to have the satisfaction of a good work and real dialogue with the other structures and hierarchical levels in that organisation.
Of course I am referring myself to the best managers and not to that rigid, self-centred manager, who has a big ego and less knowledge and who sees you as his possession or his possible rival, and uses his power to dictate your actions.
I am not referring to that kind of manager of a big company who thinks he is way too good to “lower” himself to your level, trying to perceive what you signal him.
I am also not talking about that politically-employed manager, who has nothing to do with competencies, but with political orientation and lacking the basic managerial skills or knowledge.
It is often unfair to have to work for such people, not opened enough to hear your point of views, too arrogant to even accept some suggestions and too shallow to try to understand the real issues.

Being a HR professional and working with people, the situation can be even more frustrating by not having the freedom to take the best decisions, having to face constant interfering in your work, being controlled and dictated what to do.

Your questions reminded me of a good HRLink topic: “For whom should HR professionals work?” You can find it here:
http://hrlink.in/topics/for-whome-hr-should-work#PgTop